What I Did This Weekend, With Peob Bear

Peob and I spent Saturday night and most of Sunday lunchtime putting together a gorgeous black forest trifle. Here's how it went:




















We started with a base of brownies (made with lots of really good dark chocolate and sweetened with maple syrup) baked in the wee hours the night before and left to cool until morning, then topped with half a jar of sour cherries and their juice, then topped with chilled vanilla custard cooked while we baked the brownies, then we whipped some cream and spooned generously over the other ingredients, and garnished with a sprinkling of dark chocolate. Perfection.

You can use pretty much any recipe you like for any of the components of this dish, but here are some you might find helpful:

Brownies

1 1/2 c. flour
2 tbsp. cocoa powder
1 1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
3/4 c. maple syrup
2 squares unsweetened chocolate, chopped roughly
1/4 c. water
1/3 c. oil
2 tsp. vanilla
Preheat oven to 350, and line an 8"x8" dish with parchment paper. Sift together flour, cocoa, salt, baking powder. Combine chocolate, maple syrup, water, oil, and vanilla in a small saucepan and warm over low heat, stirring gently, until chocolate is melted. Allow to cool slightly before adding to dry ingredients, stirring to combine. Batter will be very thick. Spoon over parchment-lined dish and bake 20-25 min. Cut into squares and let cool completely before assembling trifle.

Custard

3 eggs, beaten
1 1/2 c. milk
1/2 c. heavy cream
1/2 c. plus 2 tbsp. sugar
one vanilla bean, scraped, or a good slug of vanilla extract

Combine all ingredients in a double boiler (if you don't have a double boiler, a metal bowl set over a saucepan works just as well - just be sure the width of the metal bowl allows it to sit on top without falling into the water below) and warm over simmering water on medium-low heat, stirring frequently, until custard has thickened enough to coat the back of a spoon. Be sure not to overcook, or cook over too-high heat, or the egg will curdle. That said, don't sweat it if a few lumps form! Just give it a really good go with a whisk to smooth out the lumps and you're golden. Place in the refrigerator to cool before assembling trifle.

Whipped cream

1 c. heavy cream
sugar to taste
a little vanilla extract, if you like

This is such a no-brainer I'm not sure if it even warrants being a recipe. Using an electric hand-mixer, whip cream until it goes solid and creamy. See above for the kind of texture you're going for. Add to trifle as pictured above. And there you have it, ladies and gents, trifle!

My Birthday Is Nearly Upon Us: Suggestions, Hint Hint

If there's one time of year where I suppose one can indulge in a bit more than the usual amount of socially-sanctioned selfishness, it's your birthday, right? As such, since I'm turning 28 in one week's time, here are some things I'd really really really really like. Not that I'm soliciting people to buy me gifts or anything, but you know, if you wanted to gift me all of the things, I probably wouldn't protest too much. Thus:


These sexy wee beasties from bakeallthethings are cake batter blondies with rainbow sprinkles, which combines so many of my favourite things: cake batter (which I confess to sometimes liking more than cake itself); blondies (all the texturey goodness of brownies, but sometimes it just feels really good to do away with chocolate and enjoy something more... pure), and RAINBOW SPRINKLES. Love.


I don't even know if I suit wearing bow ties, but who cares? This one from newtonstreetvintage is so adorable that I'm sure I'll find some way of incorporating it into my wardrobe.


And then there's this laser cat tote bag from daintylibrarian which is, frankly, amazing. Given that I'm as enamoured as I am of science-fiction special effects of decades past, it should come as no surprise that I'd fall in love with a bag that looks like something out of 1980s Doctor Who, or possibly the first season of Star Trek The Next Generation, only vastly improved by the presence of cats.


Speaking of laser cats, there's also this amazeballs print by medusawolf.

It's a unicorn, and it's also a USB drive. Given my love for both mythical creatures AND data storage devices, I clearly kind of need this lovely creature from hemingwayfun to live. It is a thing of beauty.


Frazer Hines. Yep, I'd like Frazer Hines for my birthday. He's a handsome and clever chap. We could drink gin and watch videos, it would be a nice birthday party.

Jam Thumbprints

Oh my giddy aunt, but these cookies are flipping fab. I admit, I'm something of a slut for taking baking recipes and "ruining" them by spoiling the fun and making them considerably less unhealthy, yet deceptively every bit as delicious as their waistline-ruining counterparts. This is a rare recipe that didn't actually require any healthy tweaking from me (notwithstanding a few substitutions based solely on what I happened to have in my kitchen storecupboards) and is wheat-free, vegan, and absolutely glorious. Though I might go crazy and add a little flaxseed to the mix next time to see what happens. *insert diabolical laughter here*





Jam Thumbprints

(loosely adapted from Gwyneth Paltrow's mum kinda)

Makes exactly 43

1 cup white spelt flour

1 cup whole spelt flour

1 1/2 cups raw whole almonds, blitzed in a food processor until smallish powdery chunks (it's ok to leave some bits in, as this makes life more interesting)

1/2 teaspoon salt (DO NOT fuck up and put a whole teaspoon in by mistake. If you do, carefully scoop half of it back out. This will in no way affect the overall fabulousness of your cookie. Trust me. *whistles innocently*)

1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon

1/2 cup canola oil

1/4 cup agave syrup

1/4 cup maple syrup

some jam: just about any jam will do, as long as it's not too runny. I used a crabapple blend my grandmother made recently, but it works beautifully with apricot or raspberry, and now that I'm thinking about it, I bet prune butter would be drool-inducingly gorgeous in these as well.





Here's how they're done:

Preheat oven to 350°F. Combine everything but the jam in a large bowl and stir until the dough comes together nicely. Place in tablespoon-sized balls on a cookie sheet, and use your thumb to make a well in the centre of each cookie. Fill each of these wells with a little jam. Bake until the cookies are beginning to brown, about 15 minutes or so. Place on wire racks to cool. Tuck in voraciously.

Dispatches from the American Wilderness

Author's Note: I found this looking at poorly-labeled old word documents in search of a writing sample. This was meant to be a guest entry for another blog, written when its usual author was very busy; as it turns out, too busy to post guest entries. As such, I present it to you now, as a look at what I was up to way back in August of last year. Exciting times!

I am a notoriously terrible tourist.

This is the first time I’ve ever been in New York City. When friends asked what my plans were in the city, my response was always the same: food. Are you planning to see the Museum of Such-And-Such? they would ask me; Be sure to get photos of the Big Important Building! they would instruct me.

My response: today, I took the train from my hotel near Times Square (which I visited entirely by accident) in order to visit La Villita, a small Mexican bakery in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, that appears to have had the same sloping, sunburnt cakes on display in their front window since the 1980s (yet produces surprisingly good - and cheap - pastries). Yesterday, I had travelled even further afield to Bushwick in order to go to Roberta’s, a restaurant smack dab in the middle of apparently nothing, with only the vaguest hint of a sign above the door and a kitchen that produces some of the best pizza in America.

No, really. I’m of the firm belief that you can judge a pizza kitchen by the quality of their margherita, and I’ve been unimpressed and heartbroken more often than not in my culinary travels. The plain pie, it turns out, is deceptively difficult to get right precisely by virtue of its simplicity. The key - and Roberta’s understands this well - is to use very good ingredients very sparingly. A thin crust - at once delicately chewy and with just the right amount of charred bits - is topped with a thin layer of fresh tomato sauce, accentuated with fresh mozzarella and fresh basil. The cheese is not applied with a heavy enough hand as weigh the slices down or render them greasy and soggy; the basil is plentiful enough as to actually have an influence over the flavour without overpowering the mild cheese or the bright acidity of the tomato. The balance of flavours is truly impeccable. It amazes me that people would moan about having to schlep all the way out to Bushwick for a pizza, as I would happily trek across the Okavango Delta on a unicyle for a pie this good.

Because why? Because life is too short to eat bad food. Passing through Times Square this morning, it struck me that there are people there, visiting one of the most vibrant and diverse cities in the world, eating at any number of chain restaurants where the bland fare is indistinguishable from any other branch of the franchise anywhere else in the world. What’s the point? Maybe not everyone is so devoted as to plan their entire holiday around where to eat (like I did, admittedly) but with a little research and a little openness to adventure, you might find something truly special.

Since I’m staying near the theatre district, many people have asked if I planned to see a Broadway show during my stay. Nope, but tomorrow I’m venturing to the east village just so I can blow everyone’s mind by having ice cream for breakfast.

I don't know the first thing about babies.

But gosh, my five-day-old nephew Jasper is precious. His parents and I mercifully agree that documenting the growth and development of a little loved one is something we wish to be as free of playful backdrops and silly costumes as possible. As such, I've been enthusiastically photographing every moment of joy, distress, hiccups, gas, and naptime that have occurred during my visits with the little fellow. Suffice it to say that I'll be watching with great interest to see where his development takes him.

Here he is in action:

And my world just went and got a little bit nerdier.

Those of you who have had the questionable fortune of speaking to me for more than ten minutes are probably more than aware that I have an unnaturally intense love for: a) Doctor Who; and b) knitting. As such, I'm surprised it's taken me this long to discover that Lalla Ward, who played the lovely companion Romana II for some time during Tom Baker's tenure as the Doctor, went on to write two ridiculously adorable knitting books, which I may or may not have ordered from Amazon for like four dollars today. The first, Fowl Knits, features an array of bird-themed jumpers, some of which are also modelled by fellow Doctor Who actress Louise Jameson:

I wonder what Leela would have thought of that dodo number? It's a far cry from what she was wearing in the TARDIS, to be sure:

I haven't seen anything but the cover of the second book, Beastly Knits, but the sheer whimsical kitsch of the cat jumper has convinced me that it will be worth the $4 I spent for these books on Amazon:

I do, after all, enjoy cat jumpers. Remember that time I bought this from prettysnake?
And it's basically the sexiest thing I own.

Admittedly, my motivation to blog in this particular location waxes and wanes, while my readership remains at a constant no-one. Nevertheless, I am nothing if not an obsessive completist, and as such, I should at least be good enough to conclude the postage of my educational series on the culinary delights of New York City.



This installment, I suppose, just goes to show that nothing goes as planned in documentary ipod filmmaking; however, if I may say so myself, this is, at times, very much a blessing. I got a claymation out of it, some amazing food, a few extra days in New York City, and, it turns out, the start of something beautiful.

Sami Kelsh Eats New York, Day Seven: The Hurricane Times



It was, in actual fact, the best hurricane ever.

Sami Kelsh Eats New York, Day Six: The Mahavishnu Orchestra and the Almost Hurricane Times



So that was a good day, all things considered. Got a pony from a lady and I think I spent more time in the museum gift shop than I did in the exhibit itself.

(I couldn't finish that cupcake. It was basically pure sugar.)



I'm pretty sure this is Mercer Street, and there are prints of it here

Think Outside the Sartorial Box: A Guide for the Well-Dressed Holiday Partygoer

There are certain things that are near-inevitabilities around the holiday season: more baked goods than you really ought to eat in the space of an entire year, let alone a month; frantic, desperate last-minute expresspost shopping; and, my very favourite, parties. Next week, I’m flying down to New York City to spend Thanksgiving with my girlfriend, and I’m told that beyond the traditional pumpkin gnocchi and limoncello tart, there will be much dancing and trips to fancy-dress speakeasies. I’ve already started mapping out my wardrobe itinerary in anticipation, and this is only the beginning of a good month and a half of shows, fancy-dress balls, festive office shindigs, and the kind of New Year’s party where you wake up the next morning with nothing but a trail of hilarious polaroids to remind you of the kind of shenanigans you ostensibly must have got up to the night before. Granted, I’m told I dress more or less like an electric Muppet every day of the year, but an excuse to be even more dapper and super-flash fabulous than I already always am is always welcome, and thankfully abundant at this time of year. To that end, I’ve put together a little collection of pieces guaranteed to make you the belle of the ball. This mask by RhinestoneRevolution is sure to be a hit at any and every social event of the season. This beautiful upcycled clip from belrossaboutique is as versatile as it is charming. For those who find the holidays a little stressful, this necklace from Exaltation represents a serotonin molecule - the neurotransmitter responsible for relaxation and reducing stress. An excellent reminder to take it easy and have fun during the holidays - even when you realize you forgot to add walnuts after your third batch of your world-famous rugelach are browning in the oven. This whimsical woodland necktie by ScatterbrainTies would be a welcome addition to the wardrobe of any well-dressed gent (or gent-ly inclined lady). A silvery pinecone and icicle-sparkling quartz make this necklace by bashfulowl perfect for when you feel like the queen of the arctic tundra. Nothing says “I'm equally comfortable at a swanky dinner party in the Hamptons, or on an isolated fishing boat in the North Sea with nothing to keep me company but a dog-eared paperback copy of Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? and a few hundred herring" quite like a vintage cableknit sweater, like this gem from drowsySwords. For those who adore brisk, sunny winter days, a necklace named after a glacier in Antarctica from DearOhDeer is the perfect way to show off your snow-time love. For those who most definitely like to be seen, this shimmering jumpsuit from CircaCircus will be sure to make for a memorable appearance at any holiday do. Party on in a vintage green frock from VeraVague... ... then bundle up in this striking vintage coat from GinnyandHarriot... ... or have a party with your animal friends in this cowl from OliviaRoyale, frolicking through the snow-covered forest before stopping in a cozy woodland cottage for tea and cakes by the fire. I hope these finds will inspire you as much as they have inspired me. Rock on, free spirits!

I should like, if I may, to present to you a sexier waldorf salad.

It's one of those foods that just feels like a thing I want to eat this time of year: the contrast of tastes and textures and shapes and colours appeals to my foodie sensibilities, but to be honest, most usual waldorf salads kind of creep me out. For this one, then, I swapped out the objectionable ingredients for things that didn't frighten me so much (and shaved off some unnecessary calories in the process!) and came up with something I'm quite proud of.

What you do:

Take a good handful of greens (whatever salad leaves you fancy, really), top with half an apple sliced into thin wedges, a handful of halved red grapes, half a dozen or so roughly crumbled pecans, and a tablespoon or two of crumbled feta. The dressing is made simply by stirring together about a tablespoon of plain yoghurt, half a teaspoon of honey, and salt and pepper to taste. Perfection.

In anticipation of my soon-to-be aunthood, I've been watching old episodes of Sesame Street (and admittedly for the pure pleasure of taking a big nostalgia trip and waxing theoretically about educational strategies for young children) and as much as I absolutely adore the Muppets in all their forms, I have to say I also really get a kick out of the human-people segments: Maria's brilliant homages to Charlie Chaplin, Grover remarking to Madeleine Khan that she's looking especially attractive that day (she really did look flipping gorgeous), the unresolved romantic tension between David and Maria, Bob and Linda's decidedly are-they-aren't-they relationship, Gordon's various Timelord regenerations during the first 5 or so seasons (turns out Epic Sideburns!Gordon regenerated into Epic Afro!Gordon, who regenerated into the Epic Bald!Gordon most of us remember).

What really caught my attention today, though, was this little feature about a brother and sister having a poster printed for their lost dog, showcasing some lovely vintage typesetting and printing. I'm really quite envious of the setup that print shop's got going:

Sami Kelsh Eats New York - Day Five



(In hindsight, it turns out this day was our first date.)

Here's the thing about pancakes: I'm really fussy about them. A good pancake is fluffy, but not dry, but not greasy; sustaining but not heavy. It should not need syrup or other accoutrements, but should still be well complimented by a drizzle of maple, a pat of butter, or a portion of berry coulis. And the pancakes above did. Perfection.

It was likewise a risk on my part ordering chocolate pancakes, as my rules governing chocolate are quite specific as well: it should never be grainy, or crumbly, or be melted to the point that it resembles nuclear waste. It should appear to hold its shape, but yield upon contact, becoming a gloriously oozing mess as your knife and fork pass through. It should be perfectly smooth, and creamy. It does not need to be bittersweet. I suspect that it may well be somewhat anathema to foodie wisdom to suggest that milk chocolate has as much merit as its dark counterpart, but Gosh damn, it does. I don't think it makes me a philistine to say that sometimes I just like milk chocolate better.

As for the animated shenanigans you watched us get up to there, here's the fruits of our labour:

Sami Kelsh Eats New York - Day Four



Conclusions: Vanleeuwen ice cream = LEGENDARY. Frenchly rude patisserie macarons = overrated. Stand4 veggie burger: I suspect contained trace amounts of mushrooms, but only experienced minor swelling and numbness.

Sami Kelsh Eats New York - Day Three



My relationship to Williamsburg was, it turns out, odd. I did buy a hat to fit in with the flocks of trilbied locals I saw walkign about, but felt distinctly odd during my time there. Maybe it was the heat, or the notable lack of shade anywhere I ventured in the neighbourhood, and then it turns out most of my photos from that day got X-rayed real bad and didn't turn out. Oh well.

But here's Peob on the L train:

Sami Kelsh Eats New York: Day Two is a festival of goodness. No distance is too great (provided it's accessible via subway) when it comes to seeking out the seriously damn best food ever.



My travels are guided primarily by the needs of my tummy.

I suppose you could say that this is my newfangled attempt at actually maintaining this blog. I will begin by sharing with you the joy that is Sami Kelsh Eats New York, a youtube series of videos currently in production by me, starring me, and featuring some of the damn best food in America.

haven't blogged in way too long, i know. and why? beats me. mostly i've been sitting at home playing tetris and watching arrested development. i'm really pretty boring.

BUT.

tonight i decided on a whim that it was time to pull three random ingredients out of the fridge and pantry and turn them into soup. here be the results:

carrot, tomato, and chickpea soup
serves 6, plus possibly seconds/leftovers

1/2 onion, chopped
2 cloves garlic, finely chopped
1 good glug olive oil
3 carrots, chopped
1/2 cup strained tomato
2 cups chickpeas, soaked and drained if dried, or rinsed if tinned
4 cups vegetable stock
2 tsp. curry powder
1 tsp. sugar
a pinch of salt and a crackling of fresh ground pepper, to taste

in a large pot, heat oil over medium heat. add onion and garlic, stir, and soften for a minute. add carrots, cover, and let steam until carrots are soft. add tomato and about half the chickpeas, stir, and cook for a few minutes. add stock, curry powder, sugar, salt, and pepper, and bring to a boil. take soup off heat and, either using a hand blender or a blender or food processor, whiz until smooth. add remaining chickpeas, adjust seasoning if necessary, and cook over low to medium heat for at least another half hour. serve with green salad with creamy tahini dressing, and a square of flapjack for dessert.


mixed green salad with creamy tahini dressing

a couple handfuls of mixed baby greens
about 4 inches of cucumber, sliced into rounds

1 tbsp tahini
2 tbsp plain yoghurt
juice of 1 small lemon
salt and pepper to taste
a teensy squizzle of honey
a dash of cumin
a sprinkling of parsley, cilantro, or chives (whatever fresh herbs you've got hanging about, really)

wash greens and toss with cucumbers in a salad bowl. in another small bowl or jar, combine tahini, yoghurt, lemon juice, salt, pepper, honey, cumin, and fresh herbs, and stir to combine thoroughly. drizzle a little dressing over the greens and serve. any leftovers can be stored in the fridge and will keep well for a couple of days. it also makes a nice, sprightly dip for nice, crunchy fresh veg.


flapjacks, almost englandland-stylie
(ever so slightly adapted to suit the contents of my pantry)

1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter
1/2 cup sugar
1/4 cup agave syrup
1 1/2 cups quick-cooking oats

preheat oven to 325°. line a small cake tin with parchment paper. in a microwave-safe bowl, combine butter, sugar, and agave syrup. microwave on high, checking in every 30 seconds and giving contents a stir, until butter is melted and ingredients are thoroughly incorporated. add oats and stir until oats are coated and buttery. carefully spoon contents into your parchment-lined pan in an even layer, and bake for 25-30 minutes or until lightly golden brown. remove from oven, cut into squares, and allow to cool for 10 minutes. (then, if you're anything like me) proceed to hoover square after square until you are dragged, kicking and screaming, away from the kitchen counter.




























(bastards.)